Amikke @Amikke@social.cleverlibre.org

I'm currently trying to hack my way through Java's security API written in the finest traditions of Java Enterprise Development. After doing it for several hours (and after working with Java for several years) I'm beginning to think that all developers who worked on core Java APIs had some king of peculiar mental illness.

Let me illustrate. Imagine you have a cup of coffee represented as an object. You invoke some kind of method that returns that object. For example, getACupOfCoffee(). Problem is, you need a full cup, while the method returns you an empty one. If you are an inexperienced Java developer, you might expect to see coffeeCup.fill() method. Abandon such silly hopes. Having methods that solve problems in obvious ways just isn't The Java Way.

So what do you do? Here is a standard way the situation evolves:

1. You go thought the API documentation of CoffeeCup class. It has 89 methods. 60 of them have nothing to do with either coffee or cups. Of course it is nearly impossible to guess which is which without reading their descriptions.

2. In the process of doing just that (reading their descriptions) you discover a multitude insightful javadoc comments like "<i>setVolumetricQuadrance(Quadrance X) - This methods sets volumetric quadrance</i>". Really? I wouldn't have guessed in a lifetime!

3. You locate a method called initiateFillingProcess() -- only to find out that it is a deprecated method inherited from FoodRelatedObject class 6 levels up the inheritance chain. And yes, it has nothing to do with coffee.

4. You locate CoffeeCupFiller interface. There is no sign of classes that actually implement it.

5. You search the Interned with a query like "java CoffeeCup fill". There are 7,923,236 results.

6. The first link leads to an article about using X Enterprise Application Server to fill coffee cups. The code example spans 600 lines. It uses classes that depend on everything else in the server, which is 500 megabytes in size. (50 megabytes are XML configuration files you would need to rewrite if you wished to install it.) Best of all, after reading the sample code for an hour you find out that while the server does fill cups, it stores their filled instances inside itself without any way of getting them back.

7. The second link on the search page leads you to a thread on java.sun.com where someone else asked how to fill a cup with coffee. The reply? "Stop pestering us with such nonsense. You can use a search engine to find the answer." This is posted by a 5-star Certified Java Professional who is Triple Platinum Community Member of The Year and has 3748 points of positive karma.

8. The third link leads you to another thread on java.sun.com where the answer is "read the API reference". Yes, the same API reference you have read during step 1.

9. The twenty seventh link in search results finally leads you to a working solution. Apparently you need to use FillingEntitiesFactory to instantiate a FillingEntity, then initialize it with BufferedFiller object, which operates on CoffeeCup stub classes you can generate by running JDK command line tool cbrtrfl.exe. It's *that* simple.

~ "The Java Way", 2006

WAYLAND ON THE 3DS IS REAL AND IT TRIED TO EAT MY ASS

one of my biggest website pet peeves is when they break forward/back functionality

like you wanna skip back a page and you just keep ending up on the page you're already at

if you design websites like this, fuck you

Real tweet btw

For new people wondering why Mastodon is on thousands of servers instead of one:

-It helps protect us all against Elon Musk scenarios. It's very difficult for anyone to buy a network made of thousands of independently owned servers. (It's the same reason why no one owns the world's email network, because there are so many independent providers out there.)

-If your server misbehaves (or sells out to a malevolent billionaire), you can move your account to a different server, or even to a brand new server. Decentralisation means you're never trapped on a site you hate.

-Mastodon is an open platform where anyone can start their own server, and they don't need tech knowledge if they use a service like https://masto.host or https://federation.spacebear.ee

...and there are lots more good reasons too, to do with servers using alternative Fediverse software etc, but I'll save that for a future post 😁

#MastoTips #Mastodon #FediTips #Fediverse

I do not know who needs to hear this, but PSA: if you have a WordPress blog, you can install this extension to add ActivityPub support to your blog. It makes it possible to have people follow your blog via ActivityPub services such as Mastodon, receive new posts and interact with it.

https://wordpress.org/plugins/activitypub/

#wordpress #activitypub #mastodon #fediverse #feditips

me_irl https://redd.it/udu2lw https://twitter.com/it_meirl_bot/status/1519684590520078336/photo/1

I'm pleased to note that even https://dolphin.town, my Mastodon server where the only letter you are allowed to post is "e", has seen increased activity in the last few days.

Thanks Eeeeelon!

it appears people on mastodon are fighting about people calling themselves "twitter refugees" as if it's some sort of stolen valor thing

i promise that the words you use on the internet do not do a single thing to change the material conditions of actual victims of war

Imagine eating with your lungs! That's what clams do. They catch food particles with their gills (called ctenidia), which are covered with sticky cilia. Those captured particles are sorted to be brought to the mouth with little armlike organs called palps. Uneaten particles are expelled back out the siphon (snorkly organ), becoming "pseudofeces." How do the clams generate the force needed to expel the particles? By clapping their valves together rapidly! #clamfacts

#art