Furry in an Omegaverse Isekai @tormeh@social.cleverlibre.org

Do people who go to the gym after work know about Happy Hour?

Under the bed. #comics #cute #romance

Mastodon password please.

#Caturday #Saturday

Her: Your life just doesn’t seem to have a direction.
Me: “Down” is a direction, Brenda.

Every summer I have to paint my lawn green, but I dye grass

I've mostly been very happy with my preferred subset of C++ which is basically the "ANSI C++" I learned in college with a few quality of life features sprinkled in from later standards. It's very easy to reason about, I can work very quickly in it, and generally it's pretty easy to find and resolve most bugs you encounter, but as I've been converting Tangerine from a single threaded program to an aggressively multithreaded one I've come to appreciate that none of these statements are true

Q. Where do old dad jokes go when they die?

A. The groan yard

The headline read: Who Brought Cocaine Into The White House?

Pfffffft ... who hasn't?

If you could crack walnuts with your toes, would that be called a feet of strength?

Threads now has double Mastodon's total registered user base (and about 10x its monthly active users), 10% of Twitter's active user numbers and 100x BlueSky's total users, in the space of twelve hours

They have converted about 1% of Instagram users, which is about the level I said in my Meta article would be a very, very low water mark for them... In under one day. And climbing.

That's quite impressive no matter how you spin it or what you think about it.

HR: Well?

Me: it was a surprisingly good slingshot

HR:

Me: I didn’t know the eraser would hit him in the eye

HR:

Me: can I have my bra back?

If you have any questions, feel free to reach out! Responses may be delayed because I do not care about you

Would anyone like to make me the happiest girl in the world and take me out back and shoot me

So I entered #CrossBorderRail for the European Citizen's Prize 2023, but didn't make it to be a winning project 🤷‍♂️

There are undoubtedly some worthwhile things here in this list, but I was ultimately beaten by a songbook and a bland meeting of some regions in Ireland - and so the outcome is ultimately pretty disappointing

I just want to be bitten by a radioactive person who has their life together

Me: i can't thank you enough for the hand job

Frank Oz: *snatches muppet back* please stop calling it that

Whoa, shit just got real!

~ me, finally experiencing relief after 4 days constipated

[restaurant]

WAITER: are you ready to order

DAD: i’ll have the rabbit stew

WAITER: only if you promise not to say “waiter there’s a hare in my soup” after i bring it

DAD:

WAITER:

DAD: i’ll have the chicken