我刚想到了一个事情，也是这些年越来越明显的感受到的，不管我花了多少时间意识到并反复否认又承认，这就是无法改变的事实，就是：
自从我决定出国定居再也不会回中国的时候，我就是一个新的“ethnic group/nation/少数民族？（找不到合适的词，想必大家也理解我的意思）。总之，我就不再是“中国人民”，我也不是“中国人”，我其实也不是“加拿大人”，我目前也不知道我是谁。但是我总是知道，不同groups总是有鸿沟一样的存在，很难connect。
PS：不过这个“身份认同问题” 并不会bother我很多，我只遵循一个基本的人类需求：目前生活的环境，我觉得安全，我可以追求快乐，或者我觉得不安全的时候，我可以不用付出什么代价去fight back，这就可以了。
@dachengzi
所以移民文學總是很打動我，之前看the sympathizer第一段就很喜歡。
I AM A SPY, a sleeper, a spook, a man of two faces. Perhaps not surprisingly, I am also a man of two minds. I am not some misunderstood mutant from a comic book or a horror movie, although some have treated me as such. I am simply able to see any issue from both sides. Sometimes I flatter myself that this is a talent, and although it is admittedly one of a minor nature, it is perhaps also the sole talent I possess. At other times, when I reflect on how I cannot help but observe the world in such a fashion, I wonder if what I have should even be called talent. After all, a talent is something you use, not something that uses you. The talent you cannot not use, the talent that possesses you—that is a hazard, I must confess. But in the month when this confession begins, my way of seeing the world still seemed more of a virtue than a danger, which is how some dangers first appear.
可能只要簽證和國籍存在，人類不能自由流動就會有這樣的困境
