I have 4 months left. This year has blasted past. its already way to late to change my mind, I have approved retirement orders in hand with the end of march set solid. I still find I flit back and forth about becoming a civilian. its depressing, exciting, full of dread, full of future possibilities, sad, Loss, overly happy, proud, overly patriotic, exhausted, energized. somedays all of that at the same time.

I have to really force myself to keep to my plans. as I get closer to getting out, I keep wanting to change things up, in ways that don't even make sense. feels like I cant make up my mind on anything right now.