slowly doxxing myself on masto by revealing my location relative to every cryptid in the world, thus making it possible to triangulate EXACTLY where I live

@Ophillous I thought you lived in the picturesque meadow with endless lovely flowers.

@Surasanji that is correct, and once I am found out my oasis will be corrupted by a bunch of nerds screaming about how much they want to fuck Mothman or Bigsfoot

@Ophillous D: Not the picturesque meadow with endless lovely flowers! It deserves better than ratchet THOTs who want to get Bigfoot's dick wet! D:

@Surasanji IF 👏 YOU 👏 WANT 👏 TO 👏 FUCK 👏 BIGSFOOT 👏 GET 👏 TO 👏 KNOW 👏 THEM 👏 FIRST 👏

they are SENSITIVE and are NOT ready for a casual relationship

@Ophillous I mean, yeah, obviously. They are shy and sensitive. Probably not into THOTs.

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