My offering attached...
It's based on real experiences of living in more than one place.. even while helping people who felt aggrieved or even hard-done by me working for free and generally doing everything in my power... and how I've also regularly felt the world see others as the default or shame for others because of encroaching 'standards' and depersonalisation or people while the world looks down at people that don't confirm and can't do as they are told...
My parents were loving but found themselves even saying 'Even a dog* would have learned by now by how many times we've told you'
(*or donkey or another animal)
And I would say while still reasoning with them
"But I'm not a dog."