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I have nothing in common with people who don’t have to turn the volume up in order to hear the tv while eating snacks.

Waiter: may i recommend the steak?

Dracula: you may not

The cat just went over to the HomePod mini on my desk, meowed at it, and Siri said "sure here is some music for you" and the cat perched on the window sill listening to Garbage and Elliott Smith.

I just want to know how long this has been going on.

I just came across 4 image posts in a row with no alt text. This might be a good time to remind people to please remember the visually impaired among us, and kindly take a moment to fill in that box. Thank you! Please boost.

The best part of a Dolly Parton presidency would be the Dolly Pardons.

In Canada we get free Botox so people won’t realize how angry we really are.

An air mattress is great when you want to sleep on the floor but not right away.

STOP USING “REFUTES” AS A SYNONYM FOR “DENIES.” I just saw a headline claiming George Santos “refutes” new allegations against him. Needless to say, he hasn’t refuted anything. He’s denied allegations, and is almost certainly lying. Sloppy usage misleads readers.

Morning me just stripped the bedding. Evening me is going to be pissed.

I never know what to do with my penis in photos

My friend was bragging about how his dog can retrieve a tennis ball from over a mile away. I don't know; that sounds a little far-fetched to me.

You're so Venn, I'm sure you think this diagram is about you

The moon before sunrise this morning above Glastonbury Tor. After this came the most stunning orange sky (more to post later). Now it is actually snowing so I might have to pop out again.
#glastonbury #glastonburytor #somerset #landscapephotography #sunrise #sunrisephotography #moon

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