@thor
What I was hinting at was that when somebody, for whatever reason, does not/can not consider that the solution to their problem has a lot to do with them, they simply are not accessible to advice and help.
At least the psychologists I met and stuff I read clearly says: you cannot help people who do not want to be helped.
That is what meant by "being reflective" - to have at least some doubts about whether help is even possible.
@shibao @evelyn @zleap